April 28, 2011

There Are Times...

My sweet and happy SIL posted a "There are times..." status on Facebook today that made me think. This has been a kinda awful week for me in a few ways that I won't ramble on about. Oh wait, I probably will. This week makes me want to wallow and I probably will after I get done writing this supposedly upbeat post.
  • There are times when I feel like a truly sucky mother because my 8 month old STILL doesn't sleep through the night. Sometimes I get so frustrated repeatedly helping him fall asleep that I want to let him scream himself to sleep and I hate that feeling. Makes me cry and rush to him after only a couple of minutes. Which leads to:
  • There are times when I want to smack anyone who gives me any kind of parenting advice when I don't ask for it. I should also stick to this and sometime smack myself. Also:
  • There are times when I want to stop listening to and reading what other people have done successfully with their kid and go live in a cave so no one will contribute my already "is this how I raise my kid right?" feelings.
  • There are times when I feel like a lazy ass when I find a damp load of clothes in the dryer smelling nice and musty. Wonderful. Now I only have 12,000 loads of laundry to do today.
  • There are times when I read the news and National Geographic and I lose faith in humanity. We are so divided and unthinkingly destructive.
  • There are times when I want to be emotionally immature and hold a grudge or get angry for what someone has "done to me". I have to fight this to be accepting of others and look at the big picture and remember I LOVE/LIKE THESE PEOPLE. And no, I'm not talking about you, don't worry:)
  • There are times when I want to spend time with my hubby, just me and him. And then I tell myself shut up, think how lucky you are to actually HAVE him.
  • There are times when I wish I wouldn't tell myself how good I have it. Even lucky people deserve to wallow sometimes, right?
  • There are times when I wish people and relationships didn't change with distance, age, and time.
  • And there are times when I wish people would just grow up and grow a pair. This applies to me as well:)
  • There are times when I hopehopehope I will be a good mama. When I plead/beg whoever/whatever to please let me do this parenting thing right. I want my kid to know I love him unconditionally, no matter anything. Which is what I whisper to him as he screams and goes through this "Sleep is for the WEAK!!!" phase.
  • There are times when I wish everyone would think EXACTLY as I do. And then we'd all be so dull that we'd collectively explode and actually implode, simultaneously.
  • And last, the one that bothers me a little: There are times when I gleefully murder the ants that crawl on my counters. What is wrong with me???
PS- Please return to your normally scheduled life.


  1. Not trying to give you parenting advice, but not sleeping through the night at 8 months does NOT make you a bad mother. Kai still wakes at night and he is 15 months. Some kids are just better sleepers. You are a great mom. And I murder ants all the time.

  2. hahahahaha wait. i mean, the last one was funny. the rest of it ... wow, sounds like all the thoughts running through MY head lately and I'm not even a mama. unsolicited advice is so rough to take gracefully, especially when you're already doubting absolutely every decision you've ever made in your life ever.

  3. Thanks Mandie. Yeah, I tell myself that but sometimes I just don't listen, you know? :)

    Chris- Yep. Nothing to add to that;) You said it all. What doesn't kill us makes us stronger???

  4. Me too. All of those things! Me too!

  5. Oh, and I'm sorry if I've ever given you advice. I probably have. I don't mean to but I find myself doing that sometimes. I have changed my mind about so many things over the past two and a half years that I think mommies don't really know anything about anybody's baby but their own. The more babies and mommies I get to know the more understanding I become.

  6. No Michele, you are fine! :) I love your last comment and TOTALLY agree with it! I can read all the books and listen to all the advice but my baby doesn't care about ANY of it! He does what he wants and drags me along:)